Living in a Dubai home with domestic help is a real privilege, and for children it can also be a quiet lesson in how they treat other people, handle money and contribute to family life. Without some structure, it is easy for children to leave every task to someone else or expect treats on demand. Clear house rules, simple chores that are genuinely theirs, and a thoughtful approach to pocket money help them grow into kind, capable young people, whatever your family set-up.
Start With Respect as a House Rule
The most important rule is not about tidiness at all. Children should greet your helper politely, say please and thank you, and speak to them as they would to any adult in the home. If they make a mess, they should help clear it rather than assuming someone else will. Talk openly, in age-appropriate terms, about the fact that your helper has their own family, rest days and feelings, and that their work deserves appreciation.
Agree these expectations as a family and keep them consistent. If one parent allows shoes to be left in the hallway for someone else to move while the other insists they go in the rack, children quickly learn the rules are optional. A short family chat, and perhaps a simple list on the fridge, works better than repeated reminders in the moment.
Give Children Chores That Are Really Theirs
Chores in a home with help are not about saving labour. They are about responsibility. Choose a small number of tasks that belong to your child alone and are not quietly redone by your helper afterwards.
- Making their own bed each morning, however imperfectly
- Putting school bags, shoes and lunchboxes in their proper place
- Sorting their own laundry into the basket and putting clean clothes away
- Clearing their own plate and glass after meals
- Feeding a family pet or watering a balcony plant
- Tidying their toys and desk before bedtime
Young children can manage two or three of these; older children and teenagers can take on more, such as preparing a simple snack, helping with a grocery list or keeping a shared bathroom tidy. Rotate less popular jobs fairly between siblings.
Set Pocket Money With a Purpose
There is no single right amount in Dubai, and what neighbours give varies widely. Rather than copying another family, decide what the money is actually for. For a younger child it might cover a small treat at the school canteen or a magazine. For an older child it could include social outings, gifts for friends or extras beyond the basics you provide.
Many families find a regular weekly amount works better than handing over cash on request, because it teaches planning. Some split it into spending, saving and giving, using three jars or separate wallet sections. If your child wants something larger, encourage them to save towards it over several weeks instead of topping up instantly. Avoid tying every dirham to chores: basic family jobs are part of belonging to a household, though extra tasks beyond the usual list can fairly earn a bonus.
Handle the Awkward Moments Calmly
Children will test boundaries. They may ask your helper for snacks you have said no to, leave homework books for someone else to find, or expect their room to be restored after a playdate. Treat these as teaching moments rather than dramas. Remind them of the rule, ask them to put it right themselves, and thank your helper for their patience without putting them in the position of disciplining your child.
It also helps to protect your helper from being caught in the middle. School runs, screen time, treats and bedtimes are parental decisions. If your child says “but she said I could”, check gently and restate the rule yourself, so expectations stay clear for everyone.
Review as Your Child Grows
Rules that suit a five-year-old will feel babyish to a twelve-year-old, so revisit them each school year. Increase pocket money gradually, add responsibility, and involve your child in the conversation.
Done well, this is not about strictness. It is about raising children in Dubai who are grateful for help, comfortable doing things for themselves, and thoughtful with money — skills they will carry long after they leave home.